confession #000006

... or, 50 shades of 'office white'

today has been 'one of those days' at the office.  well, most days are like that really and truly, and any of my colleagues reading this would certainly concur.  it was just an endless 9 hours of emails, telephone calls, stressful discussions ... and junk food. 

much as i did feel empowered by certain positions i had to take today where i almost surprised myself, i now feel utterly exhausted.  i was, once again, planning on going to the gym this afternoon.  but i didn't.  had i gone, it'd have probably done me the world of good, but i didn't even have the energy to shop.  i actually walked into one of my favourite outlets, dragged my feet along the aisles but didn't even lift my hand to browse through the wares on sale or my eyes to even look at them.  it was that bad.  i could not recognise myself.  

i could not recognise myself in the mirror either this afternoon.  just before i left the office, i popped in for my customary bathroom visit and when i looked up in the mirror i saw a wan face looking at me.  i have turned 'office white'. 

i have been noticing this change in me over the last weeks and months.  not having clocked more than 10 hours at the beach this summer must have certainly contributed to that.  

but 'office white' is not just your regular paleness.  it's that greyish blue whiteness which computer monitors emit, and which, according to my theory, is absorbed by the skin, turning one into the shade i like to call 'office white'. spending my non-working hours blogging away here, on my other blog and for sundaycircle.com, keeping myself up-to-date with everyone's ins and outs on social media, or watching series online and youtube videos damn sure does not help.  

of all the shades in the world, i'm lumped with 'office white'.  actually, follow the humanae project on http://humanae.tumblr.com/ ... it's just awesome

days like these, the diet is completely forgotten.  

today's menu 

• special k with light soy milk
• special k bar
• 3 ryvita
• cheese toast
• m&s smoked salmon & broccoli quiche

i don't wish to be mean with myself - i did start the day relatively well and the cheese toast was ordered from the cafe opposite the office and almost forgotten.  i could have actually skipped lunch (which is not exactly exemplary, but maybe it means my stomach has finally started feeling less hungry!) and neither do i wish to be mean with my beloved who went out of his way to get supper sorted and got me a wholesome m&s meal, which according to their adverts, is close to a sensual - if not sexual - experience! 

still, i should have eaten fruit if i wasn't that hungry for lunch at least. but let's face it, after having read my post from yesterday, it's a foregone conclusion that apples wouldn't have stood a chance against a cheese toast! 

fingers crossed for tomorrow ... and the rest of my time! 

(well, i might actually allow myself a couple of spoonfuls of ice cream after all ... i do deserve it after today, and it might do wonders for my complexion)